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“Man, know thyself” is a phrase that has been ringing in my head for the past few months. In fact, I started writing a book about it but I feel it was delaying and I wanted to share my thoughts out in the open through this platform.

In the past few weeks, I have been hosted by my beautiful host, Glory Oladele, on Hagios Akins Podcast to talk about a few things about ourselves—our being. I will share the links to these podcasts, do stay on the article till the end.

You see, the bulk of the problems we are faced with in life don’t always have their root in others inflicting pain on us; rather, the bulk lies in us neglecting ourselves—taking little thought about ourselves and what we are capable of doing.

Permit me to sound a little bit doctrinal here. Well, of course, I grew up in the church. Let me off your hook.

God created everyone not as perfect beings, but as beings with flaws. I do not intend to say God created imperfect stuff, but you know, it is what it is, we are flawed. He knew that the kind of perfection to see him in his glory cannot be exactly attained by our moral conduct; hence, he sent Jesus Christ to make us perfect in his own eyes.

Well, that might sound a lot huge for non-Christians to digest but then this is not a religious article. Let’s keep it at that. What I am saying in essence is that we are not perfect. No man exists without weaknesses. Trust me, you have your own allergy, kind of. I am so unfortunate that my allergy is that devil called Chloroquine. It sure did me dirty as a child.

And as an adult, because I have learned my own weakness and insecurity with medicine, I run from it. Chloroquine on the right, me on the left. No matter how sick and how badly I need it. In fact, tell me the medicine is missed with something that would reduce the Chloroquine effect, Bro, the Usain Bolt would activate.

Now, this is the exact thing that I want to communicate to you from the title: “Man, know thyself”. More than Shakespeare’s cliché, learn about yourself.

The best gift you can offer yourself is to learn about yourself. It’s a type of investment.

Let me quickly tell you a few things that will happen to you if you decide today to be more conscious about yourself.

1. You stress less
2. You become more confident in your strength
3. You become less insecure about your weaknesses
4. You begin to attract good rather than toxic people into your life
5. You improve your overall well-being

You Stress Less

As I said, a lot of people’s problems have been linked to their stressing over things they could have avoided only if they knew they didn’t have the capacity to get the job done. Even as an employee, employed to perform certain tasks, it is important for you to know exactly what your specializations are—what you are capable of doing.

This way you will be able to reject tasks, jobs and duties that do not align with your skills, personal values, and perhaps are detrimental to your health.

There have been cases of people dying from work overload. Dying on the very job they applied for. Not because of equipment failure per se, but from psychological breakdown which may have led to the accident.

You see, Friend, any job that takes away your peace of mind is not worth it. You either call it to quit or negotiate a better agreement with the management. Before you even land yourself in that situation, evaluate the job requirement and your capacity. Genuinely, ask yourself, “Can I do it?”

Sun Tzu said, which I will still repeat at the end of this article because the words cannot be overemphasized in any context, “If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battle. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained, you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”

Man, know thyself.                  

You Become More Confident In Your Strength

We need not go too far as regards the impact of learning about your strength on your confidence. Look back into your life, try and remember that time you figured you could do something you thought you couldn’t do. I mean that time you realized that after all nothing was so special about that thing you dreaded the most. Could be talking to a pretty lady, starting a business, speaking in public, or punching that bully child in the face.

Now you realise that you could do them without thinking twice. Whenever the opportunity to perform comes, whether it’s sudden or not, you just take the bull by the horn and get over with it. Why? Because you have now learnt of yourself that you are capable of doing it and it’s a no-brainer.

Exactly, learn about yourself. Real confidence comes with acknowledging your strengths and weaknesses. About weaknesses, take a chill pill, I’ll talk about it.

You Become Less Insecure About Your Weaknesses

As you may have learnt from the previous point about strength, learning about your weaknesses is sacrosanct to living a good life. And as I mentioned in the opening, we are weak creatures. And that’s not the issue really, but most of us deny that we are. Now, there lies the bigger problem.

Some because of religious biases, some because of unwholesome sentiments. Whatever the cause may be, denying that you have certain weaknesses is like jumping into the ocean with a sleeping mask on and saying, “Oh, I can’t see the ocean, I won’t drown.” Well, that’s stupid. You will probably be eaten by a mummy shark before you can feel the water touching your feet.

Our weaknesses are there whether or not we admit them.

I am not saying you probably have a problem; I am saying you do have one. Look inward, and you’ll find it. Good for you if in this case, yours is “them”. Because the more aware you are of them, the less your own behaviours surprise you. The less surprised you are by your own behaviours, the more comfortable you become about revealing them to others.

Exactly Mark’s point in his bestselling book, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck. That’s exactly how to overcome your insecurities. That’s what it really means to not give a fuck. A recap: Learn them, admit them, and live above them.

You Begin to Attract Good Rather Than Toxic People Into Your Life

Like I always told my close pals, you are responsible for the people in your life by the things you say or refuse to say. You probably often land in toxic relationships because you don’t know exactly what you want.

Well, let it not surprise you; you probably are one of them. A lot of people don’t know exactly what they want out of a relationship. See, whether it’s for kinky sex, emotional support, spiritual growth or financial support, know exactly what it is you want out of the relationship. And be sure the other person is capable of providing you with such support. Because that is what will really guide and help you keep certain people out of your life.

This also includes what and what you can take from who and who. Know them. Know yourself.

I may have exhausted the list of things to say about relationships and knowing oneself in Radical honesty series 4—Disarm the manipulative gameplayer by telling the truth. Hence, I think you should check that out. However, the lesson is simple, to save yourself the stress that comes with having too many people around you who would probably stress you out, you need to learn about yourself—your values. You have to be loud—uninhibited—about expressing them to everyone as soon as you meet.

The result is folks who align with you will stay, and those who you don’t want would find their way out of your life without you even pursuing them.

You Improve Your Overall Well-being

Yeah, at this point, I probably have made enough points about well-being than I can buttress further. I might just skip it. Or leave it for you to define.

But wait, let’s not do that. They say what’s good for the goose is good for the gander. Your psychological and physiological well-being is why hagiosakins.com exist, to begin with.

Everything that I have earlier said ball around your well-begin. Come to look at it, if you have less physical stress in your life, are confident about your strengths, do away with insecurities about your weaknesses, and have fewer toxic friends in your life, the result of that is a healthy life—one free of discomfort.

So, finally, friend, the importance of learning about yourself is more than the few phrases that may have been said by great men in the past. It is more real than just words because it helps you have a direction, make quick decisions, avoid a lot of physical and psychological stressors and in the end lead to more peace in your life.

And I’ll close with this:

“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained, you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”

You don’t have to succumb. Man (put your name here), know thyself.

Yours,

Hagios Akins

 

Recommendations & References

• Self-Discovery: How well do you know yourself? [Podcast]
• What to do when you are worried about people’s opinion of you (Part 2) [Podcast]
• Eyes on the Goal, keep moving forward [Podcast]
• The truth about self-appreciation (Article by Francisca Oladele)
• Understanding your values and appreciating yourself (Article by Francisca Oladele)
• The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck (Book by Mark Manson)
• The Art of War (Book by Sun Tzu)